Hairfarmers are people who grow their hair long. Usually, the hair on their head, but the term can also be applied to people who choose to farm their facial hair. From long, luxurious, and silky-soft, to wiry, dirty, crazy, and totally out-of-control, hairfarmers come in all shapes, sizes, colors, and styles. And I am fascinated by this.
My infatuation with long-hairs started young. I had a crush on Davey Jones from The Monkees when I was four, and although he just barely qualifies as a hairfarmer, that was truly where it all began. When I was five, I became obsessed with "Land of the Lost", particularly the Will Marshall character - who definitely qualified as a hairfarmer. Also with the singer Crystal Gale, who my mother liked, and whose floor-length hair seemed hypnotic to me. By the time I was 12, my older sister's posters of Robert Plant, Jimmy Page, the Grateful Dead, and Jim Morrison could hold me enraptured.
About that same time, glam rock and "hair bands" took over the music scene. Pictures and posters of those guys also took over my entire bedroom. Floor to ceiling, and covering every square inch of the ceiling, there were hairfarmers. You could not see the paint on my walls, nor the texture of my ceiling. Everywhere, there were hairfarmers. Motely Crue, Poison, Warrant, Skid Row, Whitesnake, Ratt, Van Halen... a hundred more... and of course Bon Jovi. Oh, I dug the tunes. But the hair - and the hairfarmers - were invariably tied to that music.
And so it began. I have never grown out of it. I am thrilled every time I see one. Some days I keep a running tally. Many of my friends are hairfarmers. It can be wild, smooth, curly, straight, all kinds of colors, and various lengths, but it MUST be "long". And "long" kind of depends on the person. I have some hairfarmers whose hair is just past their ears - but it's all one length growing from the tops of their heads. And when I say, "I have.." I mean in my own personal collection. The ones I know personally.
Now, let's look at a few hair facts: